What “desisting” means to the people who have done it
People who once called themselves transgender but never took hormones or had surgery usually say they “desisted.”
As one woman put it: “Desist: stop identifying as trans. Detransition: stop/reverse medical transition… I guess I both desisted and detransitioned when I stopped taking hormones.” – QueenlyFlux source [citation:043feab4-bf94-4458-a543-52ef5d4b6d56]
In short, if you never started medical steps, the word for walking away is “desist,” not “detransition.”
Why the community keeps the two words separate
The line is drawn at the clinic door.
A man who socially transitioned but never took testosterone explains: “Desisted means you desisted against medical transition. You ‘tapped out’ before you could get started on any surgical or medical changes… Detrans means you have already begun the medical portion.” – poisonedkiwi source [citation:216e0385-a4bb-46a1-a1dc-707163432b7d]
Because hormones, blockers, or surgeries can leave lasting effects, people who reversed those steps need different support from those who never took them.
How online flairs help newcomers see the difference
In detrans discussion boards, little labels like “desisted female” or “detrans male” act as quick guides.
One poster says: “The flairs people use here are… for clarity, in showing where someone is coming from and whether they medically transitioned or not.” – purplemollusk source [citation:ab1f316c-0d0e-468b-a01-ca04f0ffaff3]
Reading those tags saves long explanations and lets readers know whose story might mirror their own.
Is desisting just a kind of detransition?
Opinions differ. Some feel that “detransition” covers any stopping of a trans identity, while others insist the word should be reserved for reversing medical change.
A common middle view is: “I think desisting is a form of detransitioning, in some way… but the distinction is important for reasons of permanence.” – ashlanlions source [citation:34dadf21-7c1b-43c8-b6e8-8d02cd813da1]
So you may hear the words used loosely in public, but inside the community the medical boundary is usually honored.
Take-away
If you explored a transgender identity socially—new name, new clothes, maybe asked friends for new pronouns—but never took drugs or went under the knife, then realized the label didn’t fit, you are what these voices call a desister.
No medical rewind is needed; the path forward is simply to live as your non-conforming self, free from the pressure to squeeze into pink or blue boxes.